Sept 17 2018
Written in 2022:
It was such a big joke then. “Disaster gays”. It was utterly frustrating to have two people who would behave like they had no opinions and no ideas for even the smallest shit always rely on me to make decision for them. I didn’t feel like just “me”, but part of some weird amoeba, and things I did spread to the other two it felt like. Oh, they certainly had their own mind, their own wants, their own feelings, but it felt like I wasn’t really privy to those, and mind reading was not (and still is not) my strong suit. I’m an indecisive person who likes to share what they enjoy but also… I like when other people are their own people?
How do I put into word the frustration and the resentment that slowly just bubbled up over time from this?