Nov 4 2019
Written in 2022:
We all saw me as the one in the wrong for everything but the acts that crossed my boundaries. It felt like they had a dozen excuses all ready to go for why it was important to them to cross those boundaries in the “triad”. It was a lot to put on Karen to help us as well. It was just me being dragged in and my behavior “corrected” when the real solution was for me to leave and remove my toxicity from them.
My toxicity being the anger I felt for being edged out, the attempts to guilt me into staying, the pleas for my boundaries to be respected, and the want for some independence on my part… I think they felt victimized by my crying and interpreted as purposeful manipulation. And when I got angry at them, of course it was wrong for me to yell at them, but it was like shaking someone in a glass jar and getting pissed when they were mad and hurt about it.