Her Own Possessiveness
“Thandi,” comes Charlie’s mumbled voice. It’s the same every night, without fail. Some nights it woke her, but most nights she slept through his quiet murmurations. Now, it was more reassuring than anything else. Some nights, when she was having trouble sleeping, it helped to have him whispering in her ear all the ways that he favors her.
Between his voice, his warmth, and his solid affection, she felt…safe. Like nothing could get her, like she was going to be fine no matter the situation. Despite his pulling away from her, she now relished these once weekly nights. The way he presses so close is so familiar now, like finding a favorite position and never wanting to adjust.
The final year of their schooling.
She’s wrong, there’s one thing that could get her. After the NEWTs, after the end of the year, after all of this… she’s struck by a sharp pain in her chest. She doesn’t regret her seven years, but she’s already beginning to mourn the loss of her boy in her life.
As Charlie is prone to saying, She’s mine, and I’m hers. A mantra since year three. Every time he’s said it, she felt a little flutter of relief and pride. And, truly, could she pass on the responsibility of Charlie to any other person?
Absolutely not. They wouldn’t know what to do!
For instance, no one would know what to do when he cried and blustered. All it takes is a smile and a dab with that old handkerchief, perhaps a pat on the cheek to reassure him.
What about when he’s ill, too? No one, not even Ruthy, really knew how often he gets sick. His behavior is generally the same. Those are the days where he doesn’t lift her, doesn’t cover her in kisses, doesn’t manage to do much aside from remain upright. That, too, could be a challenge. All she has to do is tuck him in, promise him a dozen charms, and tell him to annotate the latest in a long line of books she’s set aside just for this purpose. He will fall asleep in the middle and end up resting the whole day.
No one would know how embarrassed he was by his body and the things that teenage hormones did to it. No one would know how to staunch that old fear of his when he heard a low laugh rumble into a room. No one would be able to do anything when one of his poor moods struck.
After all, he is hers and she is his. She knows everything he needs before he even knows he needs it, now. No one else could be trusted to handle him. And no one else should be able to reap the rewards of her hard work! She deserves the hugs and snuggles and all of the kisses he’s got!
Thandi pauses, thinking on her selfishness. Well. She’s seventeen, who cares right now? She could be a little naughty sometimes! Thandi wiggles in Charlie’s grasp, prompting him to tighten and press into her, a low whine and a whispered declaration trickling out of him.
“She’s mine…”