FURY

A week–or two weeks?–ago, I drew myself together and said, “I’m going to do it. I have got to draw more to do what I wanted, and I need to get over not wanting to do the tedious Photoshop work!” I edited maybe 11 days worth of comics and then…zip.

I’ve rebooted, I’ve done scans, I’ve done a LOT of surface level cleaning on my comp, but it looks like something was seriously fucked during the short period of time I actually got to work in Photoshop.

I’m really, really…really really mad. I got so excited to actually work and things get pulled out from under me in just such a way. Half the programs on my computer are starting to fail me and it’s like being back on my laptop from 2010.

I’ve gotta figure out a way around this problem. I’m 23 and I let my dreams go for too long! Then again, I’m only 23…weird fucking middle ground there.

being your average blogger,

I don’t tend to pay much attention to my own blog. I hyperfocus on what I would like the blog to be and then get all down because it’s not quite up to par.

I think a lot of people are like that. They don’t try because something isn’t going to be perfect on the first attempt and then all those things they want to do end up kinda….dyin. I’m not making any promises on maintaining the blog (hoo-wee I’m bad at this!) but an attempt will be made! Blogging seems like a skill I should or could develop over time. It’s not as if I can’t go back and delete anything I don’t like.

Maybe I’ll post up one of my drafts?? Start reviewing things again?? I at least want to post art.

IN THE INTERIM…here’s some pics and video of my inlaws’ latest additions!

It’s Inktober!

I’ll probably be trying to keep up at least every other day since it is Inktober. What’s Inktober, you ask?

It’s the wonderful month where an artist takes on a challenge to improve their inking abilities by making one ink-based piece of work every day. I did pretty all right last year, so I decided to take up the gauntlet once more. I’m actually hoping that this sparks something more in me!

Today’s work is actually on the comic site:

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As an added bonus, here’s a bunch of stuff I’ve drawn in the past month or two:

 

Book Pile: Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls

wp-1474220506181.jpgThere’s two reasons I picked up this book: I gravitate towards anything that features owls and I’ve read David Sedaris once before (When You Are Engulfed in Flames). I have vague memories of having enjoyed his writing before, so I was quite interested in what he had to say this time round.

Unfortunately, there is just one story about owls. No mention of diabetes, either. That said, I enjoyed all the essays and the fictional stories that were written. Sedaris has a weird method to storytelling that sort of meanders into the weird and dances around self-deprecation in just such a way that it’s funny. Not just subtle humour, either. The stories occasionally get so absurd that you’re left wondering…why am I laughing? Who did he write this for?

At  the same time, there is a level of relatability that I didn’t expect to glean from an older white man living in Europe. Thoughts, habits, obsessions, little things here and there. It’s an enjoyable read, although not one to simply plow through in one sitting.

Book Count: 3 down

Keep/Donate Tally: 1/2

Book Pile: Darkly Dreaming Dexter

wp-1472786567898.jpgWelcome to the first book I’m going to make an effort to power through!

Granted, I’ve been trying to scrape through this book for a few months now. It’s so…pretentious. Edgelord. So, so, so bad.

My entire fascination with the book started with the television show. I really enjoyed the first few seasons (I haven’t finished watching the most recent seasons, so I certainly can’t claim to love the whole series) and was absolutely thrilled to be able to get my hands on physical copies of the original story. I assumed that it would have the dark humour and charm of the show, but it’s so…

Pretentious. The writing is absolutely horrid and over-elaborate and Dexter is a really inconsistent character. He talks through his reasoning like a college-age outcast wannabe! Between his extremely passionate creeping and pseudo-sexual draw to death, he’s absolutely wretched. He looks at all women–including his sister–like weird sexy animatrons. He’s completely baffled by women and then has this weird read on male characters, like he’s reading their innermost thoughts (which are really just a reflection of his egotistical edgelord thought process). I can’t help but be annoyed at every quality of book-Dexter.

He’s gross.

Out of 162 pages, not a single one was enjoyable. There are 275 total, and I think that after making it over halfway through the book, I can accurately judge if I could enjoy the rest. I won’t. It’s not even bad in a fun way, it’s just plain old-fashioned Bad. Thanks to this first book, I’m going to dump the second book into the donation bin. Maybe someone else will like Dexter “I’m a Monster” Morgan.

Book Count: 2 down

Keep/Donate Tally: 0/2

bedbugs & books

Bedbugs.

There’s nothing I fear more than parasitic, blood-sucking vermin that feed off of me while I’m unconscious (except for the idea of eventually being forgotten, and boy, let’s not get started on that can of worms).

I didn’t realize what was going on at first. It started off with one dead one that I didn’t actually realize was a bedbug and then escalated the following week. A big, fat bedbug darted out from under my pillow, and it was absolutely gorged on blood. I couldn’t sleep that night.

Thankfully, I have a stupendous wife who is able to stomach the sight of these disgusting little creatures. She took up the vacuum while I worked, sucking them up in all their little hidey-holes. She scrubbed our bedroom top to bottom, all while hushing me out of the bedroom before my heart gave out and I died a bit more inside.

She did this for seven hours straight.

Needless to say, we had to empty out our bedroom of the knick-knacks and patty-whacks to make sure that they had nowhere to hide. It’s a sad sight to me.

What’s worse, I think, is the sheer amount of books we excavated from our three-level bookshelf.

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Admittedly, I haven’t read most of these books. So…I decided to do something about that. I’m putting all the unread books into a box and committing myself to reading them. Any book that I can’t commit to gets dunked into the donate pile, where it will hopefully end up in a new home.

There is a huge amount of these books! Maybe I’ll make a post about the books I power through…

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I started writing and drawing more again. It’s been difficult for me lately, to power through my own…mental blocks, I suppose. Some days I feel, “What’s the point of it all?” and I end up laying down and doing something else. I try to make it a productive something else, sure, but it feels weird to me.

You dream of being a creative all your life and then you meet the rest of life. You end up comparing yourself to everyone else–knowing full well that you really shouldn’t, but you end up doing it anyway–and you feel crushed. It takes a lot for me now to do anything but I’m sure that maybe, if I keep trying, maybe it’ll get easier.

Feelings of self-worth aside, I have a couple little projects on the fire. The two I’m going to share are my Bonny and Kyle scripting (slow-going) and my food study project. The food study project is mostly to “preserve memory”–I only get most of these foods one time, forever, and I’d like to be able to remember all these little things.

That said, the goal is just to “preserve memory”–not to really be accurate or even really pretty. It’s something I do to play around and relieve stress and reward myself with candy. Also, it’s fantastic to limit candy intake because some days you think, “eh, I’d rather eat an apple than draw another piece of candy!”

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And here’s a snippet of scriptwork:

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I have a hard time going from written script to thumbnails, so I use large thumbnails to help script and I change things as I go.

I’m going to try to keep up on the blog. It’s a form of accountability. I’ll probably be updating the journal comic again soon, but…it’s not gonna be the same form as always.

I’ve been watching a lot of anime lately, even investing in a Crunchyroll subscription (we’re on the free trial right now to see how much we like it) and I’ve been completely taken with a few.

Well, mostly Mob Psycho 100. I love it! The manga is inspiring in it’s own way–the drawings aren’t great, but the strength of the story and composition are absolutely dazzling. It kind of makes me want to try comics again… The anime shares the compositional intensity as the manga and even ups the ante.

Here’s the first two minutes of the first episode and the opening to really nail it down:

New Header!

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slapped it here in case i choose to change it one day

This one took me a while and is the fifth attempt I had at making a header for this site…my first two attempts were staged photos, but they were just too big and I didn’t like how much space they took up. The header features a bunch of old characters that I had big plans for and are mostly just waiting on the sidelines for me to pick myself back up and get stuff done!

Here’s the photo headers:

it took so long to stage this photo

looks nice right

I also spent a while on another header, but due to a bunch of issues that I only just managed to straighten out, the damn thing wouldn’t upload. And then it did. I’m dropping it here to give it the exposure it almost had. I’m actually considering using this for a comic header for Debris of Daily Life.

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I’m catching up on a bunch of work right now since it’s currently a stat holiday and I’m taking some time away from my day job. I’m still not opening commissions again, but I might upload a bunch of legacy art or something if I figure out how to make a gallery feature…

Postcards

I’ve been struggling lately to remember I have a blog!! Here’s a bunch of postcards. Most of the cards are from the Sibley postcard set, although I have one thrown in from the Charley Harper series and one homemade (guess which one it is haha).

We have a big ol’ variety here, most of which are heading out to Postcrossing folks. I like drawing on postcards.